Second Semester

I feel like now is a good time to write.

Second semester of college has started for me. And I feel like shit. It's probably the work load. Maybe I am taking too many classes, but. I don't know! I keep hearing from people that it's too much work for me, but I can do it! I'm trying to believe in myself. I NEED to believe in myself. I really think I can do it and I dislike having people doubt me. I know I'm not the brightest kid on the block, but I'm working really hard to achieve my double major college life.

I'm such a mess inside. There's so many things that I have yet to sort out. What am I even thinking? I'm not ready for Sophomore status. It's too late now. I've already achieved it. =[ I guess there's no turning back.

The thing about college is you're always meeting new people. Every semester. I use to think that was pretty fun! But now, I'm not so sure. I feel like it's so hard for me to open up now... I just can't seem to find the time to have a social life. Well, I guess I don't need one since all my free time is always spent at the library studying.

Review of my classes:
-Modern Dance: I really like dancing, but not so sure about Modern Dance. I'll give it another few classes to decide whether or not I'm up for it. Though, I'm constantly reminded by my mother to get some exercise. You can see why I might be self-conscious about my body image.
-Business Math: Right now, it seems to be pretty easy. I'm sure it will only get harder... considering it covers Calculus and Statistics stuff. Hearing from people that had my teacher last semester, it's a self-teaching oriented class which means, the professor is probably a lousy teacher. Hopefully, my parents' genes for math will run in me. *crosses fingers*
-Intermediate Chinese: Well, considering that I am jumping two levels (I took First Semester Chinese last semester) and that the pre-reqs for Intermediate Chinese is taking Third Semester Chinese. I'm pretty screwed!! I love my Chinese teacher (I had her last semester), but! I think the way she instructs this course is a lot different. It's definitely more advanced, which is really frightening me because I feel like I'll always have to be looking at a dictionary or asking people what some characters mean. I guess that's the least of my worries, but... pretty much everyone in the class knows EVERYONE because they have been in Chinese classes together for 3 semesters. I'm the new girl. I feel like I'm shying away in my corner, hopefully it gets better. ='[
-Comparative World Literature (English): The professor is somewhat anal about things and on the first day of class and written on his syllabus, he wrote that this class should be a priority over all other classes, which is probably a way for him to scare Sophomores. Well, I need the class. I'm a Freshman. I shouldn't be in the class, but I am because I technically qualify with units, but I'm not sure... I forecast a load of work for this class.
-Photography: My class had this discussion about some things last time and I know one of the students mentioned about "Photoshop Photographers" which I think that is what I'd be labeled. I really don't want to be that, but that's how I got interested in Photography. Plus, I just love messing around with Photoshop! I don't actually know how to use it... However, I hope because of this class I will be able to learn all the techniques in order to be a "real" photographer. The people in this class seem really interesting and somewhat intimidating, like they know everything about taking photographs. Well, I'm not going to try to own up to their knowledge or skill or experience, I'm in the class to learn! Since it's a small class... I'm really hoping that I'll be able to be friends with most of them. From what I've seen so far, I think they're all pretty cool. And there's this one guy who I really want to photograph! Like I have no idea why, but I really want him to be my model for a photoshoot or something! ><" -Communications: The professor is a grad student, which is probably the 2nd time I've had a grad student teach one of my courses (Astronomy Lab last semester). She's definitely not from California, so I'm sure for a Communications class that should bring new insight to us. I'm not much of a public speaker which is one of the reasons I'm scared to death about this class. Though, we have had many group activities already where we get a chance to talk to new people and speak out our opinions. This is a custom I'm not really use to. But I'm sure that's all with time. Another class filled with large writing assignments. And also makes me realize, I need to read more news!!! (which I am now doing at my new library spot! ;D)
-Human Biology: All through my education, science has probably been my worst subject mainly because I'm not into it so therefore, I don't work hard and I don't care. But, I want to change my attitude towards it and maybe get something out of it. The professor is a lecturer. He's kind of boring, but I guess he outlines the book pretty well. I guess I like his idea of using clickers in class for participation and attendance because I'm sure if he didn't do that, I'd probably ditch. -__0 Also, he has pre-lecture quizzes online that you need to take before class. It's not too bad. The only thing is, the class is huge! Around 180 students, maybe? I don't have anyone I know before who is actually in the class so I'm usually trying to find a spot to sit in, in the front. Every class I'm always sitting next to someone new and it's not like we're able to talk. But last class, I was able to make friends with two students sitting next to me. They were really cool and hopefully I'll get a chance to sit next to them next class. =] I guess that's all I can hope for.

Those are all my classes for this semester. I have so many mixed emotions about them. I hope I can survive! And, I'm just wondering if anyone I know is feeling this way too?