Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I miss blogger sometimes, but I'm sorry to say... You've been replaced. And though, I can always look back at the times of my lovely days with blogger, I can't be with you anymore. I think this may be forever. 


Saturday, September 20, 2008

I want to address two things:

1. I appreciate that you thought of me when you were throwing a party or some sort of social gathering, it's not that I don't like you... I'm just not really into parties. As pathetic as it sounds, I like staying in my room and doing work or watching Asian dramas.

You may think I'm being a party pooper or I'm not living my life, but that's your personal opinion, not mine.

2. If you hadn't noticed before, I do have body image issues. When you say things like, "Oh! I need to lose weight... I'm so fat." I just want to smack you in the face... do you know what you're saying??! Look at you! You look pretty thin to me! I'd love to be your size! I know most girls feel insecure in their own skin, so they make comments such as these... I'm definitely not one to talk, but it would be nice to see more girls who are confident in their body and maybe it would give me some confidence in my own body. 

I weigh myself every week. And, since I've gotten back to school, I have gained 2 pounds, which makes me a little frustrated. I need to cut back on food again. Y'know last year I made excuses to people saying that Oh, I forgot to eat because I've been too busy with school. That's not exactly true. I've just chosen to not eat. I know that if I don't deal with this soon, I'm going to have an eating disorder and I'll probably never be happy with myself. But... I feel like social pressures are getting to me. I really need to lose weight.... 

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Fall Semester STARTS!

From my family, my background, my high school... they make it seem so easy to get into college. Yes, it is easy to get into college, but staying in college is not quite as simple.

I know quite a few people who will not be going to their college in the Fall.

That's just a big decision and move. I'm not sure how I'd be able to make that change. I know I'm pretty well grounded on finishing college, but that's only because I know what I want to do. And for many people, that's the tough part. But, sometimes... I feel like I'm the coward... the failure... because I can't get myself to do take that sort of initiative. To me, finishing college is my safety net. I'm too scared to try to go out and do something else right now.

I'm envious of the people who are able to give up their college education or make the lifestyle change and strive for something that might be even better, without killing themselves over regret and hardships...

Monday, July 28, 2008

I had a weird dream last night... back to this whole idea about commitment. Something I feel that I lack. I don't plan on going into detail, so yeah. Hmm, though there is this other thing I think I should go into detail about. The fact that I can never really write what I feel on a public blog. Sure, on my private blog... where no one can see it, I can. But this... not really. I'll leave it to this song...

Saturday, July 19, 2008

I know, it's still summer and I'm taking summer school and all, but I want to be back in school! I've never really been fond of summer except when I get to be in China.

I was always one of those kids that hung out at the library every single day during the summer. All the librarians at the public library I go to know me by name. Yeah, it's because I would go there after school too. Hmm, I'd say that I've gone to the library since 7th grade to junior year. Senior year I didn't really go because I had a free period and I could drive. =/

Okay, this is a totally pointless post.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

I've been really lazy writing in here since I got home. I think it's because of the fair, but the fair ends soon. July 6th! YAYYY!!

Okay, no time to make long blog entries, but check out my tumblr.

http://www.oh-serendipity.tumblr.com
^I update that because it's easier to make little comments. Make one if you haven't already, tumble logs are amazing! :D

Monday, June 2, 2008

我这个人很容易当真的。。。

我這個人很容易當真的。

It's true. I overanalyze as well, so please don't phunk with my heart!! 所以我未來的喜歡人,請你小心說話。我會當你說的話,想得很甜蜜。如果你的想法不跟我一樣,別對我怎麼好!可以嗎?好,謝謝!

我已經跟我自己說,“莫道蘭,別自作多情!” 我知道我不應該想來想去,可是我怎麼得做,還是這樣。對我來說,我也好容易的愛上一個人。Wow, my Chinese writing is so bad, but I'm sure my point got across to people who can actually read what I wrote. 

Anyhow.. MOVING ON! My first week back in San Diego has been really great! I had a chance to play my first game of Scrabble with Hui and her friends, Brian and Sitong (he stole my drink... Taro Milk Tea! So I ended up ordering Thai Tea because I didn't want to copy him... haha). I also slept late and woke up late and since my parents are in China, my mommy didn't come to my room and get mad at me! Yay? Awww... but I miss them a bunch! 

Oh! I also got to play Wii three times, on three different days... basically almost consecutively except not? Thursday, Saturday, and Sunday! :D Mario Party! Mario Cart! Brawl! Wii Bowling! Wooooo~~ I played with Bryan, Matias, Yan, Hui, and Kimmie! :D Awesome!

Then, Saturday night... that was an interesting night! Boomers was closed because of some high school's Grad Nite and I think it might have been CCA? Or maybe not. Jazzy probably knows since she goes there. But I swear I saw CC somewhere when we went over there... so we went bowling! Who went? Ummmmm... Kaitlin, Bryan, Matias, Jason, Andre, Brandon, Michael, Bo(b), Kenneth, Paul... I think that was it. Big group! :D I didn't do so well... but, I realized I'm a lefty for bowling, among other sports that I use my left-hand with. Haha. Maybe my brother was telling the truth when he said that I was actually left-handed when I was younger? Hmmm....

Sunday afternoon = Beach! Very cold! But, I finally got to see my WO MEN SHI WOMEN, Angeline and her boyfriend, Michael aka Buddha! :D Then, "kidnapped" Yan from her house and went to Matias' to play Wii again (of course!) Apparently, I'm not too shabby playing Wii Bowling as James Che! Go lefty's! ;D

Okay, I'm done. If Bryan uploads the photos that I took on his DSLR, then I'll post some of them up on my blog...

P.S. I'm not sure if I should write in simplified or traditional because I can type in both... and I'm now so used to writing in traditional because my Chinese class is taught that way, but I learned simplified when I was younger. So... I recognize both. But the question is, which do you prefer? I guess I'll write in traditional?

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Missing home?

I miss home.

But the thing is, I technically AM home! It just feels way too different! My parents are in China for business trip and there's this huge dog cage in my hallway, blocking the doorway of my room! I'm puppy-sitting for my brother and his girlfriend. So, right now... this so-called "home" that I am currently residing for is no longer home. I think this sort of thought is mainly because my parents aren't home to welcome me back...

On top of that, my room is a huge mess! And, it's driving me nuts, but I'm feeling so lazy right now that I'm not doing anything about it, but I probably will start cleaning and organizing tomorrow (if I wake up early). I'm an organizing freak!

I signed up for a summer school class. I'm taking Drawing & Composition. So, just basic drawing. I need to improve on my drawing skills and it's one of the things I need to take for a pre-req for something I plan on doing. I don't want to go into detail, but don't worry! You'll find out soon enough... sorry to be all mysterious, I know some people hate that. Yeah, so according to the Assist website, I don't think I can transfer the credits, but then on the community college website it says that it's accepted by UC and CSU schools. Hmmm, well I'm going to take it anyways, but if I don't get credit, I don't think my parents will be too thrilled about that since classes start around the same time as the Fair and I have to help out my mommy, or more like, "I'm in charge this year" so I have to balance making enough money for 08-09 school year and learning how to draw. I hope my drawing skills improve this summer or how else will I achieve my goal of becoming a designer?!!

Okay, well here's a photo of the lovely monster, Audi.